First, though, for the record (ie, Pete), here's the one on my lower back. I got it at the world-famous Tattoo Charlie's in Louisville the summer I turned 30. It hurt like hell, and I still love it. Spy, I didn't know it then, but this is one of my essentials. (I will try to get pics of the new ink soon. )
Anyway, back to the game.
I let my subscription to Vanity Fair lapse about six months ago, because one of the only features I had time to read was the very short and often hilarious "In Character," found somewhere after the up-and-coming starlet Vanities. It features three pictures of an actor who's just been given a situation to show on his or her face. "In Character" was created by photographer Howard Schatz, whose book In Character: Characters Acting was published in 2006. Here are some examples:
Center: You're an evangelical preacher, screaming to your flock, "Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, JESUS!"
Right: You're an ex-jock dad, apoplectic over the penalty the soccer ref has called against your seven-year-old son for a tackling foul.
Center: You’re a perky gal in your 20s whose boyfriend of two years has asked you to close your eyes because he has a very special surprise for you!
Right: You’re a six-year-old at the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus for the first time, startled by a bang from a huge cannon and the sight of a sleek, silver-clad woman flying high above the crowd in an arc.
Left: You’re the last New England Patriot left in the locker room on February 3, 2008, knowing that the chance of a lifetime has been missed.
Center: You’re a young entomologist on a research trip along the Amazon, happening upon a previously unknown species of borer—your ticket to tenure.
Right: You’re the tightly wound girls’ volleyball coach at a posh prep school, screaming at your well-brought-up players to “crush ‘em, make ‘em cry!”
Center: You’re a mom at your seven-year-old daughter’s ballet recital, watching her execute an adorably imperfect pirouette and an almost flawless curtsy.
Right: You’re a high-school senior whose parents are at work, just about to have sex with your boyfriend for the first time, when your kid sister bursts into the room.
All right, lovies. Hit me with some captions for these oh-so-fun snapshots. And take a few minutes to do your own version of "In Character." If nothing else, the celeb labels should boost your Google-searches!